I went to the doctor today for the whole "Well Woman" appointment thing. The doctor claims I'm normal; I'm not so sure. I've gained two pounds, require Xanax for functioning and don't have diabetes or breast cancer. Still skeptical, but buoyed by that information, I headed to the mall to see what was up. I ended up stopping into Sephora where the very nice lady transformed my face into the visage of a drag queen. I also bought $70 worth of bullshit (including a generous sample of Chanel No. 5). I would have given in to guilt if it wasn't for a follow up interview with a company I'd previously interviewed with. After it was all said and done, the HR coordinator said she would call me within the next couple of days to let me know the scoop. I'm cautiously optimistic. After all, that's the same thing the bastard pole smokers at Raytheon and Titan told me.
Oh, yeah. I also discovered another reason this town freaks me out. Lesbians. There are none. There aren't any fat people, either. When I saw a fat lesbian at Walgreens, I almost kissed her, I was so happy. Of course, that may not have gone over well (her plaid wearing, mullet-rocking chick was standing dangerously close), but then again you never know. I'm cute and my haircut is mighty fierce.
Gotta go and feign normalcy...
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